15 more Great British problems!

Why not forget all the so-called “problems” in the world and remember there are few problems, quite as bad as British Problems. Whether it’s just tutting at someone for jumping into the queue instead of actually doing something about it or watching an American open your fridge without asking – These are REAL issues facing the great British public.

This time I’ve searched through the lovely So Very British Twitter feed and I’ve also added some of my own. The So Very British people also have a new book out on Amazon that looks amazing. Perfect stocking stuffer.

Please do enjoy. Don’t tell me if you don’t, though. You like this article don’t you? Gosh I hope so. Now I’m worried. That wasn’t meant to be read in a sarcastic tone.


15. Being unable to say “I can’t wait” without sounding sarcastic


14. A fight broke out on a crammed Northern Rail train, but both blokes couldn’t move their arms so they stared violently at each other


13. A Guy at a Party in Scotland Still Wears his “Yes” Campaign Badges- and Makes Everyone Feel Awkward


12. Spending half your life worrying that people think you’re shoplifting


11. The thrill of being the first to say “I think I just felt a spot of rain”


10. “Anyway, I’ll let you get on…” – Translation: Please go away


9. “Make yourself at home” – Translation: Remain where I can see you and stay out of my cupboards


8. “Yeah, could do” – Translation: That is a terrible plan, please remain quiet while I quickly think of an alternative


7. The horror: “How about we just order a bit of everything and share?”


6. Finding someone standing in front of your desired sandwich, so pretending to study a pasta salad until they leave


5. Straining not to thank the waiter for every small item he clears, so you can deliver one big thanks at the end


4. Having at least 23 teaspoons in the sink at any one time


3. “I wouldn’t say I was overly keen” – Meaning: “Is this dog food?”


2. “I’m sure it’ll be fine” – Translation: I fully expect the situation to deteriorate rapidly


1. Being unable to say “good for you” without sounding sarcastic

Blimey! is your daily dose of British news and features for anglophiles everywhere. This article was carefully written by Tim Holt, a British actor and author based in North Carolina. He misses England very much indeed, but also loves America too. Forever torn between two magnificent slices of sod.